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Meanwhile I have removed the poll from the index page and so you can't vote anymore. I want to thank everyone who has voted. There have voted 4 people and all of you voted the same; Wow, it looks fabulous!

Sunday 21 November Henk came to pick up the B&O TV. He has inherited it from his father a few years ago as he passed away. Henk actually didn't want that TV, he didn't want any memories of his father. However because I each time stared at my own 2 feet with the former TV and this B&O TV stand on a high stand, I told him that he should take that TV… and yes, I didn't stare at my feet anymore… lovely, watching TV without staring at my feet!
But now Henk had to have that TV back which I of course totally didn't agree to. But well, I apparently have nothing to say and so he came for the TV. He did put our ‘old' 100Hertz Metz TV downstairs, but as it was turned on I crashed within 5 minutes. First I got sick as a dog and got dizzy, then I suffered from nystagmus (my eyes rolled back) and I almost fainted, then I could barely talk and I crashed. Henk was there, looked at me and didn't do shit! He drove away with the B&O TV, leaving me behind with a very good TV from which I unfortunately crash. Since Saturday night I couldn't watch TV anymore and I am pretty bored. I have got the feeling that he didn't only make me blind but also deaf. Through the TV I could keep informed of the news in the Netherlands and the world; reading the paper isn't an option due to my allergy for paper and ink (MCS) and due to severe ME I also can't read the papers on internet (dyslexia among others). And of course the TV also gives some distraction when I am in a lot of pain or when it's hard like at the moment with RIO etc. or just when working on my computer is too much for me, anyhow I can't work on my computer for hours and hours and this is also no good as for ME. Till now Henk keeps refusing to switch from TV, while he knows that the TV, my computer and spoken books are for me the most important or better said the only things to get a bit through my day and have some distraction from the pain, misery and stuff. I often had the TV on as background noise so that for example when I am home alone and I am working on my computer I don't have the feeling to be all alone, of course with the sound very soft and absolutely no music because that's where I crash from.
Now I know while some ME-patients can't watch TV, I apparently only have could the past years because it was a B&O TV.
It namely seems that B&O has a special glass plate in front of the screen which blocks almost all the EMF. Also the castings from B&O TV's are from iron which also blocks EMF. Unfortunately only B&O has this system and since short also NAD with their new LCD-TV's, but unfortunately they have about the same price as B&O… so very expensive.
That I react like this on the Metz TV is due to my EA. However at the moment I have borrowed a Grundig LCD-TV from a company. This one doesn't radiate much EMF, but still I get sick from it. I suspect it's a bit from the EMF (EA), but also because it's just not from a very good quality, at least not compared to a B&O. Because I am very sensitive to light and noise is less quality not good for me. Bad sound quality can even make me crash and bad image quality is extra exhausting for the eyes and your brains, the screen is not sharp enough and doesn't stand still enough. Because I can't see well due to severe ME ( -10 in my glasses) and because I can't focus very well, is just a screen very exhausting. So the Grundig TV can brought back tomorrow (Monday 29 November).
I was so bold to write B&O. They have emailed me back with a proposal, but unfortunately it was still too expensive for me. I have also emailed NAD, but they haven't emailed me back (yet). So I am scared that from now on I will never ever watch TV again… and then you actually come at my limit which I have put down a few years ago namely that if I can't watch TV anymore I then have reached my limit and I quit living… only this limit is reach in a different way than I actually meant. But still no TV and all that crap with RIO and stuff makes me think a lot about euthanasia cq suicide. Considering all this I think that if nothing changes to the situation and RIO keeps refusing I won't make my 34th birthday.

November 2004 part 3

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